Afraid

I am afraid. It's not a fun way to feel--and in fact, we are told that it's not how God wants us to feel:

God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but the Spirit of power and love and self-control (2 Timothy:7, emphasis mine--gee, I've always wanted to say that!).

We feel fear for many reasons. A few that come to my mind include:
*the possibility of losing someone/something we love.
*lack of trust in the Providence of God.
*Facing any unknown, which is exacerbated by the second reason.

I am, in fact, facing all three of these things at once. The 'fear trifecta' if you will. And it's soooo ugly! I have a continuous inner dialogue, and for the purposes of humor, and in some ways honesty about the spiritual battle involved in temptation~~

*Ahem* Picture the Buggs Bunny cartoon during which he has a little angel on one shoulder and a little devil on the other. The dialogue goes something like this:

Angel-Everything will be fine. God is in control, NOT you...and you should be glad! You know that some of the things you have desired in the past would have been bad had they turned out how you wanted in your small-view of how things are.

Devil-HA! Look at how hard things are right now! If he (notice that God's name is NOT mentioned because it causes all the demons to cower--yep, just his NAME--make you think about using it for His Glory a little more often? I know that the idea of giving a demon a headache makes me a smile a little...anyway) REALLY loved you SO MUCH, why would He let you feel all the pain and suffering you are experiencing.

Buggs-Well, I know God loves me, and I know He has a plan...but it does really hurt sometimes and I just don't understand why. I keep feeling like if I could just have one less thing to juggle, it would be okay and I could handle it.

Angel-And since God wants you to give it all to Him--until you DO, He cannot help you the way He wants to. He doesn't want you to handle it. He may not remove every burden like you want, but He will give you the capacity to carry them all with His Grace.

Buggs-Yep,Angel, you are right. Any ideas on how we can get this little guy on my other shoulder to go away?

Angel-(giggles)-Yep. GOD,GOD,GOD!!!!

Bugg-Wow, he really did look just that hyena from the 'Lion King'.

And So....

I am going to now affirm the Truth that I know, for all who read far and wide to know about OUR GOD, and just how amazing He is:

*He wants only our GOOD because He LOVES us. We don't deserve it. He did not create human beings out of loneliness or need, but out of love.

*Sickness is NOT in His plan, it is the result of evil in world. He can heal us, but only with our full cooperation of the Will and complete Faith and Trust--which can be very hard to have at times.

*We are precious to Him~

4.Since I regard you as precious, since you are honoured and I love you, I therefore give people in exchange for you, and nations in return for your life.
5.Do not be afraid, for I am with you. I shall bring your offspring from the east, and gather you from the west.
6. To the north I shall say, 'Give them up!' and to the south, 'Do not hold them back!' Bring back my sons from far away, and my daughters from the remotest part of the earth,
7. everyone who bears my name, whom I have created for my glory, whom I have formed, whom I have made. (Isaiah 43:4-7)

Prayer would be very appreciated, especially on Tuesday as that is our appointment day. God Bless you all!!